Why Adults Suck at Adhering to New Healthy Habits & How to Suck Less

For starters - it is much harder for the adult brain to acclimate to adhering to a new habit once fully developed due to the lesser neuroplasticity when compared to children.

BUT fear not - this does not mean adults are incapable of forming new neurofeedback pathways / connections.

I am going to delve into how habits are carried out, why NEW ones are hard to achieve - and MINDSET tricks to improve our ability to carry out and MAINTAIN new habits long term.

Here are the 4 stages of habits - according to James Clear, Behavioral Psychologist - author of Atomic Habits:

• 1. Cue

• 2. Craving

• 3. Response

• 4. Reward

Stage #1 Cue:

• This is simply a trigger for your brain to carry out a behavior

• This trigger is usually the anticipation of a reward - usually a source of a dopamine hit. Things that trigger dopamine: food, water on a hot day, sex, money, getting a “like” on instagram, achieving a goal - the list goes on.

• Our brains, according to James Clear - are constantly looking around for any sources one can draw a reward from in our day to day lives.

• Basically a cue = catching the scent on the trail that leads you to the path of a reward.

Stage #2 Craving:

• A motivational “push” to carry out an action to achieve a reward.

• Some of these things we do to relieve a craving are beneficial - others…. Not so much.

• For example - eating junk food or smoking a cigarette.

• **Note - cravings can be tricky - because we do not crave things that are bad for us - but more so the FEELING these things give - the feeling being the reward. IE a cigarette / eating a whole box of donuts is not craved because of the toxic properties in the objects themselves - but rather, because it makes one feel good / relaxed. One craves the feeling of relaxation - not the thing itself. I have never heard someone say “oh - I crave putting toxic shit in my body”. I’ll bet that if we verbalized that OUT LOUD - everytime we craved something - we sure as shit will be more likely to look for something to grab for other than a cigarette or a box of donuts.

Stage #3 Response

• Simply put, it is the habit / action we have been contemplating carried out in order to achieve the desired outcome.

• Sometimes, these responses may not occur depending on the level of motivation / inclination to do so which is dictated by the difficulty of a task.

• For example - of you really want to get a shredded 6 pack - but have 50+ pounds to lose and are highly inexperienced with the diet / exercise regime required - your ability to jump on the bandwagon and taking on EVERY SINGLE HABIT of athletes who DO look the way you wish may not be up to par. Not only that - but the number of days, weeks, months, and years required to look this way and MAINTAIN IT - increases the timeline for you to get that reward.

Stage #4 The Reward

• The ultimate end goal of this mini cycle.

• That dopamine hit

• That, "HOORA! I DID IT - LET’S POST IT ON THE GRAM OR ELSE IT DIDN’T HAPPEN."

Now we know how the stages work. WHY DO ADULTS SUCK AT ADHERING TO HABITS?

Lets revert back to the stages here:

Stage 1 - Cue:

You see a picture of someone on the internet who looks amazing - you are in AWE and think, “Oh shit, I want to look like this person!!” Perhaps, you see an old picture of what you used to look like in high school.

Stage 2 - Craving:

"What do I need to do to achieve looking like this?!" I am READY and MOTIVATED! I’ll research what workouts this person does in “x” magazine.

Stage 3 - Response:

You immediately hop on the bandwagon and go from bootcamp class to bootcamp class.

Stage 4 - Reward:

Let’s say you lose a good chunk of weight doing these silly bootcamp classes you don’t usually go to while eating a restrictive diet that has you pulling your hair out.

In many cases like this, the weight tends to go back on; while the habits used to reach the goal slip through the cracks.

Why?

When people desire to look a certain way - people are psychologically conditioned these days to be entitled to have things given to us; or, to look for the most streamlined approach to achieving a goal. This unfortunately bypasses a few essential factors that NEED to be addressed when navigating the 4 stages of habit.

The amount of effort required to achieve such a large feat so quickly is far greater than one is at mental capacity to do so.

Not to mention - the quick and easy “feel good” cues for a fix / dopamine hit is thrown in our faces - DAILY - food commercials, people at work bringing junk food, the effects of said junk food, its lack of nutrients, and the lazy-like effects they bring out in all of us.

MY SOLUTION - and basically how I coach:

Pick an easier but HEALTHIER goal to attain daily - one that you reap the reward of in a shorter amount of time.

Let each of these mini rewards build overtime.

It’s like building a pyramid. You know it can’t be built overnight. The same rationale applies to building your dream body. So what the heck makes you think you can get it that fast???? Your metabolism, hormone function, and other physiological functions do NOT work that fast.

MINDSET TIP FOR YOU:

You want to build a pyramid (athletic / healthy body)? Great - let's pick the essential 5 bricks you need to lay down and cement every day. This is far easier to achieve daily.

• Write down the five bricks you need to lay. Ie:

  • Drink 2+L of water a day

  • Eat my body weight or goal body weight in g / lb a day of protein

  • Eat 3 servings of veggies & 2 servings of fruit

  • Sleep 7 hrs avg per night

  • If I want alcohol / candy - drink a glass of water between alcoholic bevvies a day / eat all protein and fiber first before jumping on the processed food.

Now, let's incorporate this mindset tip in the 4 stages of habits:

#1 Cue:

• Identify the healthy cues vs unhealthy / unattainable (ie looking like a model / celebrity)

• Realize that the celebrity THEMSELVES do NOT look like they usually do when on the cover of a magazine. They did strenuous work for a few months / weeks to prepare for that photoshoot - then gained back 5 -10 pounds for their maintenance weight.

#2 Craving:

• You want to look like a model but do you want to live that life?

• Maybe you want to simply feel more energy.

• What response / actions will have you feel better / more energetic? (the 5 bricks)

• Essentially - UNDERSTAND WHY you have that craving BEFORE you act on it.

• Ie “I really love this picture of me in high school - WHY do I want to look like this?”. “Perhaps I wish to FEEL more functional, energetic and youthful again’”.

  • “What do I need to do in order to feel more like that again?”

  • “What habits do I carry out right now that would help me reach my goal?”

  • “What habits do I lean towards that pull me in the direction I DO NOT wish to go?”

#3 Response:

• You carry out the 5 bricks for a solid 3+ months before adding more to the load.

• Drink 2+L of water a day

• Eat your body weight / goal body weight in g / lb a day of protein

• Eat 3 servings of veggies & 2 servings of fruit

• Sleep 7 hrs avg per night

• If I want alcohol / candy - drink a glass of water between alcoholic bevvies a day / eat all required protein and fiber first before jumping on the processed food.

#4 Reward:

• You start to feel better / stronger

• Build on the 5 bricks. Add a couple more once you develop proficiency at laying the first 5.

• Rinse, repeat, re-evaluate every few weeks.

This was a simple breakdown of how to instill better habit feedback loops. It may not be as simple when navigating the stressors of everyday life. But hey, it sure as shit is simpler than shooting for your dream body overnight.

Stop making your life more complicated than it already is.

Simple steps, long lasting results. Am I wrong?

Feeling stuck in your ability to form / adhere to new habits?

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